America Speaking Out

Filed under: — Bravus @ 9:28 am

The US Republican Party has started a web site, ‘America Speaking Out’, because apparently:

America deserves a Congress that respects the priorities of the people. Unfortunately, Washington hasn’t been listening. Let’s change that. America Speaking Out is your opportunity to change the way Congress works by proposing ideas for a new policy agenda. Republicans have offered solutions, and we have our principles, but this is a new venue for us to listen to you. So Speak Out.

Naturally, that has gone about as well as you’d imagine. Here are a few samples:

All border patrol officers and ICE agents should immediately be replaced by terminators armed with lightsabers. Not only would this solve the illegal immigration problem, it would also be friggin awesome.

Stop the obesity epidemic and improve science education in one fell swoop! Put Ray Comfort in charge of science education. We won’t have any more of that troublesome science. And the bananas will be good for the kids.

We should invent and patent more colors. Like fuchsia, but not that because it’s already been invented.

Implement a “flat tax”, because anything less than a B cup is un-American. Bewbs. 9/11

Have the senate vote on, and decide, if the cake is in fact a lie.

We ought to think of a better name for it than “yiffing.”1

The whole site is pretty much like that – plus it keeps crashing all the time:

STEP 1: Design and run a patronizingly simple-minded website that barely functions with more than 4 users. … STEP 2: Try to run a global super-power nation of 320 million people and a nuclear arsenal. … BABY STEPS

Anyway, if you’re short on amusement today, get amongst it: http://www.americaspeakingout.com/

  1. If you have to ask, you don’t want to know. Trust me on this one.

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